


(I Get) Lost

by canadasuperhero



Category: Band of Brothers
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Nightmares, disturbing imagery, graphic depictions of injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-04-25
Packaged: 2018-06-04 13:01:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6659053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canadasuperhero/pseuds/canadasuperhero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Doc Roe still has moments where his guilt gets him lost in his own head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(I Get) Lost

**Author's Note:**

> The implied suicide occurs in a dream and does not involve actual weaponry. The imagery can still be disturbing and I feel it is best to warn for it as I warn for the other instances of violent imagery. Please let me know if you see something else you would need/like to see tagged.

Eugene dreams of dodging through a forest of splinters, bag bumping empty and useless against his thigh. As he passes a pale and grinning Toye the man raises a hand in casual greeting. “Thanks for the boots, Doc. Didn’t much need ‘em anymore though.” Gene looks down and down towards his own bare, blue feet across the white to Toye’s legs – bloody ribbons of flesh and cloth and pale, pale bone ending in nothing but shrapnel and snow.  
  
“Didn’t think you’d mind so’s I sent 'em on to a place of honour up General Taylor’s ass.” Gene opens his mouth to protest, to tell Toye to sit down goddammit, to do anything but Joe interrupts still smiling. “Would give you my brass knuckles in exchange but someone’s calling for you.”  
  
And they are. Faded screams of “medic” drift through the fog and Gene wants to stay, to rush forward and press white compression bandages to the man’s jiggling flesh but his own legs are moving him away without his permission and so he can do nothing but stare down at his feet as the world sets to blurring around him; as he passes more and more men missing faces and limbs and hold their guts inside their own bellies as they call out friendly missives of “Hey Doc” and “Better luck next time, eh?”  
  
He passes Nixon who gives a weary, stunted wave and shoots himself with a bottle of Vat 69 while Winters looks on fondly, peeling off the layers of his clothes and handing them to passing soldiers until he’s down to his own flesh and peeling off strips of that as well, reaching out to hand a piece to Eugene.  
  
“Morning, Gene.” Winters gives him a weary smile as the world moves forward around them. “You mind giving that to Private Hall; I hear he left his in Normandy. Then you get yourself down to the aid station, get some hot chow in you and a good night’s sleep.”  
  
Eugene screws his face up, tries desperately to tell Winters that he is sleeping but instead Winters just passes him another piece of himself and says “Pour vous” in Renee’s soft voice before pushing him firmly back into the stream of the world around them, into the cries of “medic” and “Doc” and “Eugene Eugene ….  
  
"Eugene, come on!” Gene unscrews his face, opens his eyes to see Babe crowding him with a glass of water posed above his face and Liebgott just behind with a cigarette dangling from his lips and an interested eyebrow cocked on his face while he and Webster pause with both their hands clutching at a dollar bill in the background. “Jeez. See, I told you assholes, he’s just a heavy sleeper is all.”  
  
Eugene’s eyes flicker up towards the glass and Babe flushing sheepishly (with blood that doesn’t pool from a ragged hole in his neck or stain his teeth, with life) is the best thing Eugene has seen.  
  
“Well.” Babe grins. “This was just in case.”

**Author's Note:**

> Title from The Head and The Heart's Lost In My Mind.


End file.
